My Apology

I owe some friends an apology for a true culture and personality gap. I honestly thought my perspective was more appropriate than someone else's and I was wrong.

Here in Germany, personal privacy is a big deal. The thought of having full-body scanners at the airports is an absolute joke and sending your resume to companies without asking first if the position is still available is seen as revealing your information to more people than necessary. In the States, many people think their airplane is more safe with more scanners and that you should get your resume onto as many desks as possible.

And to top off the typical American view of not needing so much privacy, I am an extremely open person in general. In fact, I've had new people I meet say, "Wow. I've learned more about your life in this first 10 minutes than you'll probably ever know about mine." And many people have asked if I have any secrets...I don't. I'll answer any question you ask and often times I'll share personal information without being drilled for it.

I knew this would be an adjustment for me, because my German friends told me before moving here that I tell way more about myself than anyone in Germany does. I actually have to hold myself back when talking to new friends, because I'm afraid I will push people away if I share too many details too quickly. While some people like my openness, lots of people here think it's really strange!

So here's the story that deserves my apology: While I was visiting Germany at Christmas time last year, I took lots of fun photos and put them on Facebook. Once I arrived here in May, I learned that many people in Germany are not a fan of Facebook because they want to keep their private lives private. While I understand that nothing is 100% secure from hackers, I do have my Facebook settings set to where only my "friends" can see my information and photos. I thought that was private enough that my German friends wouldn't mind being in the photos since it's just for my "friends" in the States to learn about my German adventures. WRONG! My German friends recently found out I had posted pictures of them online and were very upset!

To be honest, my first reaction was that they are too conservative and since my privacy settings are as strict as they can be on Facebook, it shouldn't be a big deal. I thought maybe they didn't understand that it's not on the open Internet, but instead just in a place where my friends can see the photos. I also (selfishly) didn't want to take the photos down because they were great shots of what I'm experiencing here and I didn't have good photos of those locations without the people in them. But the more I thought about their perspective, I realized that I should have respected their wishes and taken the Christmas photos down as soon as they mentioned in May that they didn't want to be on the Internet. That comment, as surprising as it was to me, should have triggered me to go back to the album and delete the photos immediately. But I didn't. And I'm sorry.

So I've learned there are many cultural differences here, some which I agree with wholeheartedly and some which I don't. Understanding these differences, however, does encourage me to do better at respecting others' wishes and perspectives.

Everyone's Connected to Germany

I didn't hear much about Germany before 2009. I had never been to Germany or known anyone close to me who had traveled there in recent years, but as I told people about my plans to move this spring, stories came out of the woodwork.

One person would say, "Oh, my family was stationed there when I was a kid." Another would say, "I was an exchange student there in college." Then I'd hear, "My uncle married a woman from Germany." And last, but not least, someone would add, "My ancestors were German. I'd love to trace back to where they lived."

While no one ever mentioned German roots to me before 2009, now I feel like nearly every person, or at least every family, has a connection to this great country. And while I found a few stories online about some women (military wives in particular) who did not like living in Germany and wanted to return to the States, every person I know who's been to, or lived in, Germany loved every minute of it and would love to go back again someday. It's just different enough to be exciting, but still similar enough to our US culture that it's not too scary.

Recently, I've even learned that some folks reading this blog have a special connection to Germany, which is why a friend sent them the link. So now I know there are people I've never met who read this blog and I'm glad it brings back good memories for them! I love the idea of making people smile as they remember their own adventures in Germany and the similar transition stories they experienced.

Lessons from a True World Traveler

I wanted to share this great article a friend found online called "20 Things I've Learned from Traveling Around the World for Three Years." Click here to read it.

From what I've learned in my first three months outside the US, I couldn't have said it better myself!

100 Days

Today marks the 100th day I've lived in Germany. What a transition it's been!

After submitting my paperwork on June 4th, I finally received my residence permit with permission to work yesterday...day 99! This means I'll start teaching business English at companies around the Stuttgart area in the next couple weeks.

While I'm still no where near fluent in German, I can now say important things like "Can I have...," "I need...," "Sorry, my German is bad." and "How much does this cost?" I'm far more confident today going out by myself than I was when I arrived in May. I used to be petrified someone would talk to me in German and I wouldn't know how to respond. Now I'm used to it and have some basic phrases ready to go!

Many people from home have asked me if I'm happy here. The answer is a resounding YES! I am learning so much about myself and about what's really important in life as I explore this new culture. When you grow up without an international presence in your life, you tend to think things are done the American way all over the world...WRONG! Now that I'm seeing the way Europeans live, I can analyze the differences and decide which way I think is the best for me. They have different education systems, governmental structures, recycling laws, and general ways of living. I know I've mentioned some of these things before but most places are closed on Sundays, there are bike paths everywhere, cars are much smaller here, people aren't attached to their cell phones or jobs 24/7, and energy usage is a big deal here! That all takes some getting used to, but allows me to determine what matters to me and what doesn't.

When I see Alfons put away his work phone on Friday evening and not check it again until Sunday evening or Monday morning, that's pretty telling that he wants to focus on what's going on at home on Saturday and Sunday. He knows that if his company had a real issue he needed to tend to, that they'd contact him at home. He doesn't need to carry both cell phones and check work email every few hours, like most people in the States do. That doesn't mean that he doesn't work hard Monday-Friday. It just means he knows how to separate those areas of his life from one another, which is nice!

And regarding cars here, did you know that all the car companies make a smaller model than the ones you've seen in the US? Ford makes a Ka, Nissan makes a Micra, and Toyota makes an Aygo and IQ (both smaller than my Yaris). While these vehicles probably wouldn't be successful in the States since people love their pickups and SUVs, they are great cars and are a good option here since parking is limited and the city roads are small.

So those are some of my thoughts on Day 100. Thanks for following the blog and here's to more great adventures in the next 100 days! Cheers!!!

Get it? Got it. Good!

Have you ever realized how people change the way they talk when speaking to kids? Adults unconsciously change the vocabulary they use and speed at which they talk to match a child's age and situation. There's a technical term for this called rough-tuning, and nearly all adults do it without needing to learn how.

As I meet new people here in Germany, I am now able to rough-tune my speech fairly quickly based on the person's English skills and understanding of what I say. It only takes a couple sentences for me to translate their facial expressions, and I have to be careful because there's a fine line between sounding condescending and properly rough-tuning to the person's language level.

What's funny about rough-tuning is that you immediately bounce back to your regular level when necessary. When I call my family and friends back home, I talk super fast and use typical slang no one here would understand, such as "get my ducks in a row."

Did you ever realize that "get" is a slang word that has multiple meanings? Do you get me? Go and get it! Get into it! Get up! Get going! Got it? The Germans who only know basic English have a hard time with this one, so I have to remember not to use that word since there are better words to describe what I am trying to say. Do you understand me? Go and buy it! Wake up!

With Alfons, I can use about 95% of my regular (American) English vocabulary and I speak at about 90% of my regular speed. He's familiar with most daily slang, and I can use words like gonna, wanna, shoulda, etc, but I still try not to use the true slang stuff like what they say on Jersey Shore. (I hope he never has to learn what those fools are saying!)

With some of my friends whose English skills are pretty good, I just slow things down and again try to choose my words wisely so they understand me the first time without having to ask or be confused. If I say an uncommonly used word they probably never learned, like shuttle or bumper car, then I usually say "do you know shuttle?" before going on, so they don't feel silly asking.

With some folks I meet whose English skills are not so great, I speak very slowing (in a non-condescending way) and I smile a lot. I praise them for what they say correctly and I show them how bad my German is, so they feel better!  In fact, I just learned the German words for, "Forgive me. My German is very bad." That usually makes people smile and at least they know I'm trying!

Here are some basic words I have learnd to replace when possible to help ensure a mutual understanding:

Get = buy, understand, grab, etc.
Right = correct
Niece = sister's daughter
Do laundry = wash my clothes
Awesome = super (Super is a German word too.)

So if you decide to visit and would like to meet my German friends, don't be surprised if I need to translate some of your English into their English to be sure my friends don't misunderstand you!

Aleve Me Alone!

I've now realized that Americans are pill lovers!  We have an over-the-counter pill for every problem...even for different versions of the same problem. We not only have cold medicine, but there's sinus cold medicine, sore throat cold medicine, coughing cold medicine, body aches cold medicine, daytime cold medicine, nighttime cold medicine, etc, etc, etc.

Here in Germany, there's just all-natural heal-the-body medicines. Their medicines don't really cure the problems, but are supposed to make you get over it more quickly. And the selection available is not great!

Alfons and I got a head cold this week and luckily I had some Aleve Cold & Sinus in my purse. When he asked what type of medicine it was, I said "it will make you feel like you're not sick and you can plow through the day like normal." He then replied something like, "so it's not going to cure the sickness, but instead just cover up the symptoms? How does that help me get better?" I laughed!

Americans have too many things on their to-do list to be sick! They have work to do, kids to pick up, meals to cook, bills to pay, lawns to mow...and there's just no time to be sick, so they do what they can to just "plow through it."

While I didn't mind being sick this week since I'm not working right now and have nothing on my to-do list, I wonder how I'll feel when I have to call in sick to work or cancel evening plans once my Aleve runs out.

Only if You're a Farmer

Disclaimer: I don't know the actual farmland laws here, but this is based on what my farming German friends have explained to me.

The housing outside the big cities is separated into small villages where all the houses are clumped together. While some people have a very small front or back yard, many don't have anything but a little landscaping with a sidewalk.

In between each of the villages is typically farmland. The only houses you can find between villages are farmhouses with a barn. That's because people are not allowed to purchase farmland to build a house with a big yard. In order to purchase farmland or a farmhouse in Germany, you must prove you are a farmer. You have to go in front of a judge and discuss your farming experience, which for most people comes from growing up in a farming family. Typically when those children grow up, they rent a few acres from farmers to grow their own fruits and vegetables to get more experience and practice before owning their own large farms.

(Forgive the fogginess in this picture, but it offers a good example of the village/farmland layout in our area. You can click to enlarge it.)

Both agriculture and the beauty that nature brings to Germany are very important to the people here. While some villagers would like to own a small piece of land for a horse or large garden, it is more important to them to preserve the landscape and beauty of this country. So those folks are left with only the option of renting an acre or two from a farmer down the road.

Since only farmers can purchase the large properties, someone who owns a farmhouse with land cannot sell it to just anybody. Even if a family with a lot of money wants to buy the property, the farmer typically cannot sell it to them if they cannot prove they have farming experience and plan to use the land for agricultural purposes. In rare cases, a judge can determine that the property in question doesn't need to be farmed anymore and someone else can have it, such as if a village wants to purchase a portion of a farmer's property to expand its size. That doesn't happen very often though, because most villages want to stay small and quaint.

No Buttons Please

We live about 15 miles outside a big city in a small village of about 3,000 people and are surrounded by farm fields. Many non-farmers rent a small piece of land from a farmer so they can have a garden to grow their own fruits, vegetables and flowers.

The great thing for me is that those hobby farmers usually grow more than they need, so in many places around this area you'll see a sign or cart by the road that says "Blumen" (flowers) or "Gemuse" (vegetables). Since it's not possible for these people to man their field or cart all day, they charge people using an honor system. There's typically a small sign with prices listed and a locked cash box with a small hole to drop in your coins.

Just down the road is a flower field that has different flowers every few months as the seasons change. When I go for a walk through the fields, sometimes I stop and cut a few fresh tulips or gladiolas for the house...if I have some change in my pocket. Unfortunately, some people just leave buttons or lint in the box since no one is watching, but that doesn't happen too often, according to my friends with a vegetable cart a few villages over from ours.

My friends sell zucchinis, pumpkins, potatoes and some vegetables I've never seen and thus, cannot translate for you! So far, they've had great sales on the weekends and there was only one day that five zucchinis were gone, but there was no money in the box. My friend was really disappointed that day, but I suggested she just think of it as charity and assume those people needed a free meal for their family that day.

So it's a win-win for everyone. The hobby farmers get a few extra euros each week and I get fresh flowers and vegetables any time I want...so long as there's change in my pocket!

In the Moment

Life in Germany is different. People aren't in such a hurry here and they tend to focus more on the moment at hand rather than what could be. For example, people here do not put their cell phones on the table at dinner. That is considered extremely rude because the person sitting in front of you should be more important than any potential phone call or text.

I think in the States, we've been conditioned to always be available and if we don't answer a phone call or text immediately, others get annoyed or worried. I've now realized that those people can wait and that I'm not important enough to get any calls or texts that are so urgent they can't wait until after my dinner.

Speaking of dinner, that's a whole different experience too. Servers take your order, bring your food, then leave you alone. One reason they can do this is because there are no free refills, so people don't chug their drinks and expect a full glass to appear in front of them. There's also very little tipping, so the servers don't have to be your friend by the end of the meal to get a good tip. You typically leave less than a buck if everything was fine and stop there. Since the servers are paid by the hour at the restaurant and not from the tips, you can sit and have a drink or meal for as long as you want. No one pressures you to get up from the table and the server just waits for you to flag them down to get the bill whenever you are done. They don't usually drop it off because you might decide you want another beer or coffee. It usually takes Americans a while to get used to this dining style, and I've finally adjusted. It's nice.

Life on Sundays is very different. Stores are closed here and it's supposed to be a family day, whether you are religious or not. Neighbors do not want to see you mowing the grass or washing your car. You are supposed to be spending time with family or friends just enjoying one another's company. The only things that are open on Sundays are restaurants and cool places to take your family like castles, pools, amusement parks, etc. It's great to see moms, dads, sisters and brothers all spending real quality time with each other.

Professionals also get six weeks of vacation time per year here. This, again, promotes quality family time and reduces stress and burn-out at work. While I'm a hard worker at the office, I really like that the culture here doesn't expect people to work around the clock and be attached to their BlackBerries 24/7. Germany truly embraces the concept of a work/life balance, which most American companies only pretends to support.

No Kangaroos in Austria

Alfons whisked me away to Vienna, Austria this past weekend to see a beautiful city with hundreds of years of stories to tell. While the weather did not cooperate for our city tour on Saturday, Friday evening and Sunday afternoon were delightful!

When we arrived, we walked down Maria Hilfer Strasse (the shopping zone) to the city center to see the Parliament building and other gov't buildings that were hundreds of years old. They were beautiful, but both Alfons and I were surprised that the city wasn't cleaner and better maintained as far as sidewalks and streets. The very touristy places were nice, but as soon as you were off the main grounds, things weren't as well-kept.

The food was my favorite part. We went down a small side street and found an awesome little cafe on Friday night that served delicious steaks, the best-cooked broccoli I have ever tasted and perfectly seasoned potatoes. On Saturday, we had wonderful schnitzel as we sampled each of the house wines. We wrapped the meals up on Sunday with a slice of Mozart Torte and Sacher Torte, traditional chocolate Viennese cakes.

The highlight of the city was the beautiful Schoenbrunn Palace where the infamous Austrian Empress Sisi lived. The gardens were unbelievable and the interior decorations of the palace weren't too over-the-top like most palaces. It was very tastefully done...for an Empress anyway!

Rosetta Stone Review

Tons of people have asked about my opinion on the Rosetta Stone language learning software. I have finished the first of three levels in German and I'm fairly satisfied with my progress, but it's not easy. I've read lots of reviews in the last few days to get more thoughts and here are my conclusions:

1) The first level is extremely basic and doesn't teach conversation. It's focused more on simple vocabulary and sentence structure, which is important if you really plan to learn the language. But if you just want to know enough to get by on a vacation, you'll be frustrated that it's teaching you "the ball is blue."  Levels two and three (from what I read) are far more conversational.

2) You cannot return (past a month or so) or resell the product...ever!  The company was sneaky enough to put controls on the disk so if it's ever put in a second computer, you have to call the company for them to unlock it so you can use it again. From the reviews, I have heard this is a nightmare and that you have to prove your purchase. Even if you never officially register the product, it somehow knows the original owner. In short, you're not going to get any of the money back and it is VERY expensive, so you had better use it!

3) Since the software is self-paced and you need discipline to get through it, it's really best for people who MUST learn a language rather than for those who just WANT to learn a language. It gets hard...really hard at times. It also gets frustrating when the sentences don't make sense or they teach you a word that doesn't have a direct translation into English. We think the translations should be one-to-one where each word has a different meaning in that new language, but it's not that simple. German, for example, doesn't have a direct translation for "sorry" so you have to say "it does myself sorrow."

4) It shouldn't be your only tool for learning the new language. I would recommend having small phrase books or quick learning manuals by your bedside to teach yourself for 10-15 minutes per night as well. It gives you another way to learn and you can look at the subjects you want to know.

5) Speaking of subjects, Rosetta Stone has its own curriculum and there's no skipping things. While I have already learned the names of many sports in German (which aren't particularly interesting to me), I still have not learned the parts of the body. That means when my neighbor's kid falls down and hurts himself, I don't know what is injured, his wrist or his shoulder. I had to look to other resources to teach myself those types of things I wanted to know.

6) There's no language teacher available for asking questions. If you don't have someone close by who knows the language you're learning, you'll struggle with the Rosetta Stone. There will be times when you have no idea what the program is trying to teach you and you'll need a multi-language dictionary, or better yet, someone you can discuss it with. Rosetta Stone doesn't explain the grammar rules or sentence structure. It tells you the sentences and expects you to figure out the patterns.

Overall, I'm reasonably happy with the product and my progress so far, but I don't think I'd buy it again if I had the choice. I would opt for an actual language class that was scheduled weekly and that expected me to do some homework so I could move forward more quickly. At home, it's so easy to think you'll just do that module tomorrow. I should be a lot farther along in my software than I actually am, and that's frustrating.

If you decide to buy it, good luck and stick with it! If after reading this you think there's probably a better language learning method out there for you, I encourage you to put it on your to-do list (today) and find out when there's a class or club meeting near you. And go on Amazon right now and order a cheap language learning book to get you excited about the potential!

Formality Bites

I ran across a website the other day comparing the differences between American and German culture. I laughed my head off when I read these two things. (I've edited them into my own words.)

1) Germans use a fork AND a knife to eat their food, while Americans typically use the fork AS the knife. Americans also like to eat with their hands, skipping the utensils altogether, which is a no-no most days in Germany.

When I first moved here, Alfons asked me multiple times to please use my knife to cut things. It took me a while to get used to it, but now I can use both utensils without looking stupid. Of course, I still cut things with my fork at home when we're eating alone and I just accept his eye rolling.

2) Germans like formality, while Americans tend to think formality is hoity-toity and that genuine friendliness calls for informality.

Before I came to Germany, I told a friend I was worried that people overseas wouldn't like me, since the Germans I met in my MBA classes told me I was TOO open and friendly for the German culture. My American friend quickly replied, "One moment. I'm getting a news flash from the Stuttgart Times. The headline reads 'American woman singlehandedly makes entire country of Germany 70% more friendly.'" That lifted my spirits!  I do think I'm making little changes in our neighborhood.  I wave at neighbors I pass in my car and say hallo to anyone I walk past on the roads. In the first few weeks, no one waved back or said anything in return, but now that people are meeting me (or hearing about me from other neighbors they know), people are waving back and saying hallo too. :-)

I mentioned to Alfons that many Germans I have met so far judge people as soon as they see them. He actually confirmed that to be fairly true and I replied, "I hope they label me as 'that friendly American girl!'"

Friday, I signed for a package that belonged to another guy in our building who wasn't home. I didn't know what the guy looked like, but later that evening, Alfons saw him pull up in front of the building so I grabbed the package and started to walk out the door.  I figured the guy probably didn't speak English, so I asked Alfons if I could say "Das ist fur dich," which means "This is for you," only the "you" in this case is the informal "you" in German. Alfons immediately corrected me and said don't EVER use the informal "you" with an older person you don't know. So I went out the door, said the man's last name to be sure I had the right guy, handed him the package, and he said, "danke (thank you)" and smiled. I hope he thinks I'm friendly, even though Alfons wouldn't let me use the informal "you." Uh oh! I suppose the guy I met in the laundry room last week thinks I'm crazy for saying "Wie geht's?" which is the very informal version of "How are you?"  Now I know better.

The article I found online was not only right about the general American culture, but it was dead-on regarding my behavior. It's certainly an adjustment being here in Germany, but I'm not going to let anyone change my genuine friendliness. Most people who have gotten to know me here say it's refreshing and they don't mind my informality at all. Thank goodness the English language doesn't have a formal and informal "you" because I bet I would have gotten in trouble with that all my life!

It's a Big World

Since the only English television stations we get here are CNN and BBC, I watch a lot of news shows, and most of them are world news programs to be more specific. Watching these shows has made me realize that I know nothing about what's going on in most countries around the world. While I am pretty good at geography and at least know where the countries are on a map, I can't tell you the president or prime minister's name of any places outside the US.  I don't know which countries are democratic and which are not.  And I certainly can't explain the history of any country except the US...and that's still iffy.

I remember many years ago at an interview, the man on the other side of the table asked the infamous, "So what are your weaknesses or areas you'd like to improve upon, Cara?"  While there's a mighty list of these things, the first one that came to mind was current event knowledge. (I had always been poor in history classes at school since my comprehension skills weren't up to par.) So I decided that day, many years ago, that I would try to do better at understanding current events and major happenings in world history so I wouldn't be the idiot in the room if someone wanted to discuss WWII.

I failed. I tried to watch some news, but quickly became overwhelmed by the names I couldn't pronounce, the cities I couldn't find on a map, and the religious groups I didn't know existed. While I don't expect to catch up on everything, being forced to watch CNN and BBC here in Germany have certainly boosted my current event knowledge and I am not afraid to ask Alfons to explain past events to me, as he's far better versed in history...be it European or anywhere else.

One thing I've learned so far is that I am extraordinarily blessed to have the opportunities I have had in both the USA and in Europe.  Had I been born in a third-world country or one torn apart by war, I could not be where I am today.

Even when your day gets tough, remember your blessings. It may be difficult, but be thankful for everything you have, even a crappy job, a car with no A/C or a leaky faucet, as those things are only a dream for millions of people around the world.

Making Memories with Mom

Before she left, Mom said she wished she had written everything down that we did so she wouldn’t forget anything. Well, here’s our list, Mom. Now everyone will know how much fun we packed into your eight-day visit!!!!

Day 1:

Picked up at Zurich airport in Switzerland

Saw cute little Swiss houses

Visited not one, but two seas with a beautiful view

Drove up the Alps and saw cows wandering

Bought some Alp Butter Cheese 

Heard cow bells that sounded like wind chimes

Ate at a café where Mom had her first Wurstsalat

Drove to Hildrizhausen to see Cara & Alfons’ place

Day 2:

Took train to Stuttgart

Walked down Konigstrasse checking out the shops

Saw the old wooden elevator (out of service unfortunately)

Ate lunch outside at a Paulaner Café and tried more Wurstsalat

Watched a crime show being filmed

Found a beautiful fountain and park downtown

Day 3:

Celebrated Mom’s Birthday in Tubingen!!!

Had lunch at NeckarMuller on the water

Took a wooden boat down the Neckar River

Shopped for Cara’s Birthday gifts (hehehe)

Picked up by Angela for convertible ride

Ate dinner at Krabba Nescht near Black Forest

Day 4:

Picked up curtains from seamstress by the pool

Our neighbor Heike made Kasespeztle for lunch

Returned bottles at grocery store and got fresh bread (Mom’s favorite)

Cleaned house before Alfons’ arrival (typical Thursday)

Started project to recover dining room chairs

Day 5:

Took train into Stuttgart again

Had a ham & cheese croissant for lunch at Kamps

Took a 2 ½-hour city tour of Stuttgart

Tried to see the city from the television tower, but too foggy

Mom ate CurryWurst for the first time and loved it

Stopped at farmer’s market stand in Hildrizhausen

Ate at Schnitzel Academy with Angela & Wolfgang

Day 6:

Delivered recycling stuff and got yelled at by an old man

Went nordic walking in the fields and dodged the goats
Visited a Skoda dealer to look at new cars for Alfons

Shopped at Real (Germany’s version of Wal-Mart)

Saw Wolfgang’s new wood table project at his parents’ home

Visited Angela & Wolfgang’s vegetable field

Bought chocolate at Ritter Sport factory

Prepared a very late meal for their arrival (meats, cheeses, fruits)

Day 7:

Walked up to an old fort with a great view

Stopped in a very old city called Esslingen 

Tested two ice cream parlors for comparison

Cooked on new grill with Angela and Wolfgang

Played CatchPhrase and laughed our heads off

Day 8:

Drove to Irndorf to visit Alfons’ parents

Watched Cara make homemade Spetzle noodles

Walked to a lookout point of the Danube Valley

Stopped by the Lake of Konstanz (aka Bodensee)

Drove back to Zurich, Switzerland

Ate cheese fondue, raclette and cordon bleu at Adler’s for dinner

Walked down the cool streets of Zurich in the rain

Their Football vs. Our Football

Here are a few things I don't like about European football (aka soccer):

1) The clock never stops, even if there's a major injury or a goal is scored.
2) At the end of each half, the ref decides how many extra minutes the game will last based on how much time was wasted by injuries and goals.
3) Even when the additional 1-3 minutes are up, the ref can stop the game whenever he wants. (There are some ways to determine this, but I've seen all the so-called rules be broken by multiple refs.)
4) There are only three refs and two are on the sidelines with little power. They can only raise their flags when they see something wrong, but the main ref (who may not have seen it) has to make the call.
5) There is no instant replay for the refs to watch if there's a disputed action. Whatever the main ref calls is what stands.  (That really sucks when the audience can see the replay and knows the call was bad.)

In fact, there were so many bad calls during this year's World Cup, the FIFA president actually said he would begin discussions about using more technology for the 2014 games.  He did, however, say he would not consider video replays, but instead things such as electronic goal sensors so refs will automatically know whether the ball passes the goal line or not (since a ref mistakenly said England didn't score a goal against Germany when they actually did).  I know he's trying to maintain the tradition of the sport, but when you can reduce human (ref) error for more accurate games at such an important event, it's time to join the new millennium.  (And you're already 10 years behind.)

So now that the World Cup is over - Spain won by the way - it's time to get excited about American football, which is right around the corner!

Alfons' brother-in-law Wolfgang likes sports so a few days ago, I decided to start teaching him the complicated rules of American football in hopes that he'll want to watch a Colts game or two with me. He learned about the four downs, the different ways to score and the main players' roles. I have a small plush football I bought at a one-euro shop a few weeks ago, so he and I pretended to be the offense and defense as he learned.  I even showed him the classic Charleston knee-crossing dance when I made it to the pretend end zone!!!

T-Minus 7 Days!

YIPPEEEEE!!!  My mom is coming to visit one week from today!!! She is the best mom in the whole world, and I miss her like crazy. She calls me each morning on her way to work and she sends me a card every week reminding me how much she loves me and how proud of me she is for taking this exciting leap in life, but unfortunately hugs are not something you can send through the mail.

She'll be here for her birthday next week, so I've got an amazing day planned for us on the 21st! I'm going to try not to pack too much fun all into one day, but I can't wait to show her our little village, the great city of Stuttgart and the beauty that surrounds us. (Good thing she'll be here for 8 days...though that's still not long enough!) 

I'm so lucky that we live between the Neckar Valley vineyards and the Black Forest, which are both such beautiful areas. And there's so much history here. My favorite castle is on a hill we pass each time we visit Alfons' parents. It's older than the USA! Call me a silly, uncultured American, but that's just unbelievable to me.  I think Mom will love it here!

That Girl is High Maintenance

...not anymore.  We don't actually live IN Stuttgart, Germany.  We live about 25 kilometers (15 miles) away from downtown in a great little village with only 3,000 people or so.  We have a small grocery store (that runs out of fruit by mid-day, so go early), a gas station, a bank (that's closed for a 90-minute lunch break each day and doesn't come back from lunch on Wednesdays...fyi), and a couple small shops.

I've lived in or very near big cities all my life and did not think I'd enjoy being this far away from all the action, but it just takes extra planning!  Since everything's closed on Sundays, you have to make sure you have enough to eat one day in advance.  That would have been easy for me when I lived off TV dinners, but now most things in the house are fresh and go bad quickly.  Our tiny fridge can go from full to empty in 2.0 days easy.

And as far as image goes around here...no one cares.  I'm sure there are people who care somewhere (maybe downtown), but the people I've met here don't care what brand your purse is or whether you wear pajamas to go shopping.  In fact, I've started wearing less and less make-up each day.  Unless I have an interview, there's just no need to get all dolled up for the neighbors.  I've come to accept my white eyebrows, lack of eyelashes and abundance of freckles from all the sun I'm soaking in at the pool.  Don't get me wrong!  When I start working, I'm sure I'll put on some mascara, but I will certainly try to keep it to a minimum.

Holiday Weekend

While the Germans don't celebrate Independence Day on July 4th, I still tried to make the best of my holiday weekend. On Saturday, the German soccer team was playing Argentina (the favorite) in the World Cup. We were trying to make it to the top 4 teams!!! Angela and Wolfgang invited me over to watch the game, since Alfons prefers to go bike riding during the games, because the trails are empty and he's not a soccer fan. Angela's friends Nicole and Anya joined us with their flags, facepaint, hand clappers and vuvuzela! (In case you haven't heard about the vuvuzelas, just Google it to read about the controversies those little plastic horns have caused in South Africa during the World Cup this year.)

I wore my new German shirt and stole Nicole's Deutschland hat. Then we all painted little German flags on our faces and cheered for our team. We had a blast and the Germans won 4-0!!!!!!  Woohoo!!!!!

After the amazing game, Wolfgang grilled some brats and frikadellen outside as we all chatted about nothing in particular on the patio. Nicole and Anya speak fairly good English and we've hung out together before, but this time they came prepared with a tiny little pocket translation dictionary. It was hilarious to see them say, "wait a minute...I have to look it up." They didn't want other people to tell them the words they needed, so we'd wait on them to figure it out.  It was fun!

I didn't do much on Sunday except hang out at the house with Alfons. I watched (aka slept through) Shrek and ate the Oreos I had bought a few days earlier to be sure I got a taste of the true American spirit on July 4th!

What the Hay?

I'm so lucky to get to see the agricultural and the business perspectives here in this beautiful country! This evening, I helped Angela & Wolfgang bale their dry grass and stack it in their parents' barn. I even drove the tractor as Wolfgang put the bales in the trailer. I was only going about 2 mph, but then he let me hit the gas, and I got up to about 4 mph!

Angela and I rode on the hay stacks in the trailer on the way back. It was unbelievable! We had the best view in town looking over all the fields and neighbor villages.  Too cool!

We had to stop once to let a herd of sheep pass by.  There was a guy with a big stick at the front of the herd and an actual German Shepherd dog at the back of the pack, doing his job of keeping them in line!  I don't know that I've ever seen a real working dog in the States.

To unload the hay back home, Wolfgang handed me the bales on the second floor, from down below, then I lifted them up a few more feet to Angela on the next level so we could store them in the loft. Whew! I'm sure my back will hurt tomorrow, but it was worth it!

Call Me Betty Crocker!

Check out these photos of my most recent cooking adventure preparing a great meal for Alfons on our anniversary...all by myself!  (Click any photo to enlarge it.)

To see how close we are to the grocery store, look for the solar panel roof in the middle of the picture. I'm lucky to be able to walk there!

So the cake came in a box. That still didn't help me.

The directions are all in German. It took me an hour to translate them and I still didn't understand what to do. That's when I improvised!

In the oven it goes...rise, baby rise!

Time to make the dough for my Schwabian (southwest Germany) noodles, also called Spaetzle. Flour, eggs and a little salt, then work those arm muscles!

Here's the process: Put the dough in the masher, squeeze the dough strings into the boiling water, let cook, then SHOCK the spaeztle in cold water so they are not mushy.

Cake is almost done. Multitasking is tough in the kitchen when everything starts dinging at you!

Once the spaetzle is done, you put it back in a skillet and poor cheese on it to make kaesespaetzle, which is my favorite kind! Here's the finished product.

A little powdered sugar to cover the spot where I split the cake open when I unlatched the springform pan. Think he'll notice?

Dinner is served, right on time! I also made the salad and cooked the meat, but didn't take pictures of those.

Alfons was a few minutes late because he stopped to pick up these beautiful flowers for me!!!  :-)  I didn't mind.

What's the Opposite of a Green Thumb?

Today was my first day working outside in Angela and Wolfgang's (A&W) vegetable garden.  It's a pretty big field and Alfons' parents and I worked for two straight hours pulling weeds from around the potato plants.  This picture is a couple weeks old, but we worked on the five rows on the right and the plants are much bigger now!

I'm a city girl and have never had a garden or anything of the sort.  In fact, we didn't even have houseplants growing up because my dad and I were allergic to most things.  And I swear I have whatever the opposite of a "green thumb" is because nearly any plant I touch dies soon after it's in my care.  Now I am learning the rules of the gardening game and I may be decent at it with some training.  Alfons' mom gave me a small tomato plant a few weeks ago to put on our terrace and (thanks to Alfons' guidance) it's still alive and getting bigger.  I don't like tomatoes, but it will be pretty cool if we get a few Alfons can eat.

Speaking of eating...after we worked in the field, his mom and I stopped at a strawberry field and picked our own fresh strawberries.  UNBELIEVABLE!!!  I don't think I've ever tasted a strawberry that fresh and without a bunch of chemicals on it.  His mom taught me how to sneak a free bite every few minutes while the attendants weren't looking.  Hehehe.  Once we got home, I couldn't keep my hands out of the bowl of strawberries, so they didn't have as many to take home with them as they planned.  Sorry.

All day, Alfons' mom talked to me in German and we're getting better at communicating with every visit.  She told me that she and Alfons' dad have never been on an airplane, and I told her my mom is coming to visit in July.  I asked if she will cook a traditional Schwabian meal for my mom when she's here and she agree.  I can't wait for my family to see the life I'm living here and learn about this wonderful country!

Parking Woes

I have grown confident in my driving abilities now that I know the German signs on the roadside and the unwritten speed limit rules.  However, I am still totally lost when I have to park.

Parking garages are around, but once I'm in them, I have no idea what the signs on the walls say.  It this space reserved?  Are the numbers at each space for a reason or can I park anywhere I want?  And where's the exit to get to the street level once I found a spot?

The other day after an interview, I pulled my car out of my garage parking space and headed to the exit.  I realized just before it was too late, that I was supposed to pay BEFORE I got in my car and there's no attendant.  The only pay machine I could see was by a handicap parking space, so to avoid that, I traveled all around the three floors of the garage looking for another machine where I could pay.  After 10 minutes of no luck finding a second machine, I decided to pull into the handicap spot with my flashers, jump out to pay, then jump back in my car as quickly as possible.  (Don't worry.  There was a second handicap spot one space to the right if anyone needed it.)  Anyway, that seemed to work, but boy was it stressful and embarrassing.

Parking on the street is another story.  There aren't parking meters, but you still have to pay at most places, so again, you have to watch for the signs.  At some places, you have to pre-pay down a block or so, and then put the little printed ticket in your windshield.  At other places that are two-hour-only zones, you have to put this special devise in your windshield (see photo).  Every car has to have one in it and when you park in these zones, you take out your little blue plastic clock thingy and set the time to when you arrived (but you can go to the next full half hour if it's 10 or 20 past).  Then you put that in your windshield so if the parking police stop by, they know when you arrived and whether you've been there for more than the two-hour limit.  It's genius, but hard to remember.

So while I'm okay driving around by myself now, my blood pressure still takes a beating when I have to stop driving and find a parking place...ugh!

Father's Day Card

Father's Day in Germany comes right after Mother's Day in May, so it was an adventure trying to find my dad an appropriate card.  Since my German is less than elementary, I had to decipher the message on each card based on the pictures and the few words I could translate.

I found one card with a little bear on the front and a bigger "papa bear" on the inside who was relaxing in a recliner with a remote control and some popcorn.  I figured out that the front said something about "getting past the stress and when the work is done..." and then when I opened the card and could see "papa bear," it said "Geniesse deine Ruhestand."  Knowing a few words on the front and seeing the picture on the inside, I assumed the phrase said "Geniuses deserve rest."  I thought that would be a great message for my dad!

When I got home and translated the text online, I discovered the inside said "Enjoy your retirement!"  Ha!  I sent the card anyway and figured dad would get a kick out of it.  Happy Father's Day!

Not a Drive-Thru

One thing you might notice when visiting Germany is that there are very few (if any) drive-thru options.  You might find one at McDonald's (or as Alfons calls it, The American Embassy), but other restaurants don't have them, banks don't have them, drugstores don't have them and liquor stores certainly don't have them.

In fact, the entire idea of a drive-thru seems pretty strange to many Germans.  Why would you waste gas and pollute the air just so you don't have to get out of your car?  Are you lazy?  I say to the Germans, "try running errands all day with kids in car seats and then tell those mom's they are lazy for not wanting to go into the bank to deposit a check!"  Now if you don't have kids in the back (or another legitimate reason), I do think you should go inside, but that's just me!

On another note, I've been wanting to visit the Swiss Alps, but Alfons says I need to work up my walking muscles before we do that.  I said, "We don't have to hike it.  I just want to see it."  He said the Alps are not a drive-thru adventure and that we should experience them from within.  It's interesting how many Germans embrace nature to this extent and want to be a part of it, while Americans often think if they have seen it, that's good enough.

There are many things I love about this German adventure, like when I learn about the cultural differences, I get to decide on which side of the fence I sit.  While I understand the desire to see beautiful things, I'm quickly going to the German side on this one.  I agree that it's a whole different experience to be a part of nature rather than to only take a snapshot.  Although there's a time and place for both options for sure.

Visiting the Parents

The brick oven Alfons built so his mom could bake bread.

The homemade rhubarb cake his mom and I made together...mmmmmm!

Meet Hasso!

This is Alfons' dad making dinner on the grill for us.

Part of his mom's garden. (click to enlarge)

Watch out for the chickens!

Take time to smell the flowers!

On the way home, I figured out where Rottweilers come from...

World Cup

Since most of my friends are not soccer enthusiasts, I thought I should take a moment to discuss the HUGE event nearly one billion people around the world are focused on right now...the FIFA World Cup.

For an entire month from June 11 to July 11, 32 nations will square off to determine the best soccer team in the world, and this only happens every four years.  It's like March Madness on steroids.  While I don't know who this year's favorites are, the past winners are Brazil (5), Italy (4), Germany (3), Uruguay (2), Argentina (2), France (1) and England (1).

So if you notice World Cup references on Facebook or see USA flags hanging out car windows, there's a good chance those people are soccer fans and aren't getting much work done this month...Ha!  And while I'd like to tell you that the USA team has a decent chance of winning, we haven't been in the top four since the first World Cup in 1930 and even then we only finished third.  Sorry.  Wait - I have an idea!  Why not root for your buddies in Germany?  They play today...check your local listings!

Things I Miss

Friends and family are a "gimme," so we're going with THINGS only. And I'm sure there are some things on this list that are in Germany, but I haven't found them yet!

Honey Nut Cheerios
Cold milk from a plastic jug, not a box
Ranch dressing
My shower radio
The egg poacher on the side of Mom's toaster
Qdoba's chicken nachos
Fabreeze spray
My roller blades
Wrinkle Release spray
Lawry's Seasoning Salt
Crushed ice
Truly automatic transmissions
Clocks that can't say 0:05 or 17:35
Cheddar Cheese
Puffs Plus
My filing cabinet
Johnson's Baby Lotion
Tampax Pearl
English TV that's not news
Mark's Feed Store's buttermilk pie
My hairdresser (okay, I know that's a person, but I haven't found one here yet)
Mary Kay's eye make-up remover
Dairy Queen Blizzards

My First Teaching Lesson

I've never been an official "trainer" before, but at most of my previous jobs I have trained new employees and I've done a ton of presenting during my undergrad Speech Team days and on the Entrepreneurship MBA business plan competition circuit.  I also used to run an education department where I hired expert trainers all year long and watched many of the best in the business.  While I knew I had a lot to learn about language training when I got here, I now have even more respect for this group of professionals, as I am discovering it is far more difficult than anticipated.

I attended a seminar today for future language teachers and to show us the true basics of starting to learn a new language, the instructor taught us how to say, "Hello.  My name is ____.  It is nice to meet you." in Bulgarian.  This experience was eye-opening, because it put us in the place of our future students who may not know a single word of the English language before they find themselves in our classrooms.  There were only three of us in the seminar, but it took more than 15 minutes to teach us just that short Bulgarian phrase.  The instructor only spoke in Bulgarian, so we had to figure out what he was saying by his gestures and tone, and he said he actually moved much more quickly with us than he would in a real class.  Whoa!

If an instructor only speaks in the language he/she is teaching, this training style is called monolingual.  That means you can't say, "Tschuss in German means bye in English."  You have to wave, walk away and say, "bye," so the students understand the meaning without hearing the word in their own language.  It takes a long time to teach the basics monolingually and there's a lot of repetition and practice for the participants.

At the seminar, I had to present a demo lesson where I taught the participants about the different bills and coins of US currency.  I showed large pictures of the coins and gave each student one of each to examine.  I told them the value for each coin and asked the students to tell me which coins would make up a certain amount, such as 48 cents.  That checked their knowledge of the values and pronunciation of each coin's name.  Then I told them some additional words we use in America when talking about money, like buck, grand and change.  There was no direct feedback at the time, but I think the demo went very well and they had lots of comments and discussions about the currency after the session, so that made me feel good.

America's Next Big Thing!

Warning: Avid beer drinkers should not read this posting!  You will be offended and I want no hate mail.

Before studying in Germany last summer, several friends said I HAD to drink the great beer here.  So, much to my dismay, I started drinking "beginner" beers before my trip to Leipzig last July.  I found I could tolerate Blue Moon, Amber Bock and a few others.

Once I got to Germany and then visited Prague, I fell in love with the dark Kozel beer made in the Czech Republic.  That encouraged me to venture out and find more good beers!  Since living here, I've tried several and most are just fine, but then, Alfons' brother-in-law Wolfgang asked if I wanted a Colaweizen one day.  Yes, you guessed it!  It's half cola and half Hefeweizen, a popular light beer.  At first I thought he was crazy, but then he said lots of people in Germany drink it and sometimes they call it "diesel" because it's a funky color.  So finally I tried it, and now it's my beverage of choice.

When you're in Germany, expect to pay 3-4 euros for a drink, no matter what you order.  They don't typically serve free tap water, so you either pay for a fancy bottled water, small cola with no refills, beer or wine.  I typically choose a Colaweizen now or a nice glass of Riesling.  (I just can't bring myself to pay that much for water when I don't really like it anyway.)

So I've decided that one of the breweries in America should start marketing Colaweizen as the next big thing! They could get more girls to like beer and make it what all the cool kids are drinkin' in the States...maybe!

Noticeable Improvement

Today, Alfons and I traveled again to Irndorf to see his parents.  We helped with their enormous yard work and I learned to use a pitchfork to pick up grass.  Why we didn't have one of those when I was a kid I'll never know!  When I was young, we had to pick up the grass with our hands, which I couldn't do because I would immediately start sneezing.  (Don't worry, Dad.  Even if you had given me a pitchfork, I would have come up with another excuse to get out of the yard work!)

That reminds me, (knock on wood) that I don't have allergies here...at least not yet!  That is amazing because my allergies are crazy in Louisville, because it's in the Ohio Valley.  I had no allergy problems in Indy for 10 years, but I thought it would be a problem here because Alfons said a lot of people have allergies and it's a valley.  I'm just going to enjoy my breathable days as long as I have them.

Now back to my real story...while at his parents' house, I spent quite a bit of time learning from his mom.  She'd show me what to do in the field and I'd follow her lead.  She'd point to trees and plants telling me what fruit grows on each and I remembered many of them from my last trip and our discussions in the garden.  Plus, my Rosetta Stone and iPad language learning apps have really helped too!  It's rare now that I have to say "I don't understand" to his mom, because my basic German is getting better and her elementary ways of explaining things to me is improving too.  It took us some time (and strategic charades), but eventually I figured out that she was trying to tell me her four chickens were girl chickens and that's where she gets eggs!

There's still a long way to go before I can have a decent conversation with them, but I'm discovering noticeable improvement on each trip.

Random Note to Self:  Never again use the American phrase "I am pooped!"

Won't You Be My Neighbor

I've only met a few, but I like the neighbors so far!

While I was trimming the bushes out back today, a little neighbor kid kept saying "Hallo" and waiving.  I would respond "Hallo" and waive back over and over until he got tired of saying it.  After the landscaping work was done, I decided to play with him in the neighborhood sandbox.  I soon learned from his mom that his name is Aaron and he's the same age as my niece Paige.  I explained to his mom that I know about as much German as her two-year-old, so he and I should be able to communicate a little.  Luckily, she's pretty good at conversational English, so we talked for more than an hour in the beautiful sunshine.  She only works one weekend per month as a nurse, so she said I can hang out with her, Aaron, and their other son Ben (who was at Kindergarten) anytime I was bored at home in the future.

People told me that it will be hard to get folks to talk with me in German here because everyone wants to practice their English skills and, sure enough, as soon as her husband got home from running errands, he was excited to talk with me in English as soon as he learned I was from the States.  He said he uses English often at work, but doesn't feel like his sentences are always right.  He said "please correct me if my grammaticals are wrong, because I want to get it right."  I didn't have the heart to correct that one, but agreed that I would correct him in the future.

We all had a great morning together playing with Aaron and dodging his squirt-gun full of water!  :-)

One of These Things is Not Like the Other

I've discovered some important differences you must understand when going from the US to Germany:

1) When driving in a neighborhood, the person coming from the right has the right-of-way since there are no stop signs.  Just assume you NEVER have the right-of-way and you'll be fine!

2) Individual toilet paper sheets are a different size.  This may not seem like a big deal, but you would be surprised how you tend to use the same amount each time and here, the roll doesn't have a breaking point right where I want it, so I have to decide if I should take more or less every time.

3) Energy is expensive in Germany, so you must put major electronics on power strips to easily turn them off when not in use to avoid paying for "phantom power."

4) German dryers have a bucket where they store the water they get out of the clothes.  Be sure to empty this after every load or your dryer will turn off on its own and you'll be stuck with wet clothes.

5) Finally, all measurements here are different.  Temperature, distance, time, etc.  And while I would like to think Americans do most things the best way, I'm not convinced that making kids learn there are 12 inches in a foot, three feet in a yard and 5,200-ish feet in a mile was the smart thing to do when we could have implemented the simple base-10 metric system!  Here, there are 100 centimeters in a meter and 1000 meters in a kilometer.  That test would have been so much easier in third grade!

Weekend Up North

This past weekend, Alfons and I went to visit our MBA friend Peter and his family at the very northern tip of Germany in Glucksburg.  It's Autobahn all the way, so I let Alfons drive since he drives a lot faster than I do, and we got there in about 7 hours...most of which I slept thanks to the Dramamine.

Alfons went to a conference on wind energy Thursday while I went shopping in Flensburg for the day.  We had dinner with Peter's family and they have a cool little house in their backyard that's a Finland tradition.

This is the inside where there are seats all around and a large fire pit in the middle to keep you warm in the winter.






On Friday, Peter took us out in his awesome boat on the East Sea where Germany and Denmark meet.

These were cool water houses built right in the fjord.

A German Army building for training.

Hello, Denmark!!!

We also had lunch at a marina where I learned to get the fish off the bone!

Then on Saturday, we went to Hamburg...

We hung out at this beautiful park for a while.

Meet the Parents (Take 2)

I met Alfons' parents at Christmas, but I knew VERY little German then so Alfons' sister Angela and her husband Wolfgang translated everything for me.  For this visit, they weren't going with us and Alfons doesn't like translating everything that happens like Wolfgang does.  If his mom tells a big, long story at the dinner table and I ask "what did she say?"  Alfons says "Some new neighbors moved in."

His mom wanted to show me her garden so I grabbed my pocket-sized German language book and headed out back.  As she pointed to the ground she would say vegetable and fruit names, so I would look them up to figure out what she was growing.  We were both pretty excited to be able to understand one another since I could describe the colors of each thing to be sure I knew the right food.

His dad doesn't say much, but he liked my iPad.  I showed him the fishpond where he could make waves in the water, the paper toss game where he could throw wads of paper into a trash can, and a translation app that has German/English flashcards.  He thought those were pretty cool.

The Cooking Disaster

I hate cooking.  Remember that!

So I'm trying to learn to cook here in Germany, so mostly I watch Alfons cook and when he's not here, I use the internet to translate the back of food I buy at the grocery.  Tonight, Alfons wanted to make goulash, so I carefully watched as he chopped the onions, put the special pepper and tomato sauce in with a certain amount of water, and put the lid on the pressure cooker.

I am scared to death of pressure cookers and always will be.  I've heard horror stories of people putting a hole in their ceiling when the lid pops off and since I know I suck at cooking, a pressure cooker just isn't a good idea for me in the kitchen.

What I can do is boil water.  So Alfons tasked me with cooking the noodles that go under the goulash.  Once the water was boiling, I put the noodles in the pan and set the lid on top.  Then Alfons decided to let some of the pressure out of his contraption and I was in awe!!!  This this was making crazy noises and squirting out of holes I didn't know it had.  And just then, the water from my noodle pan poured over the edges!  And I mean POURED!

Alfons and I grabbed towels and tried to clean it up before the stovetop started burning, but then he told me to get away quickly!  I don't know how European appliances work, but I'm pretty sure you aren't supposed to see steam coming out of the oven when you just spilled water on the range.  So I got out of the kitchen and watched from afar as he tried to figure out how water got down below and how much damage it had caused. He then realized the wiring for the stovetop was right where the water had seeped in, and he ran to the circuit breaker to shut off all the kitchen power.

He grabbed a screwdriver and took some time getting the entire over out from under the built-in range and sure enough, there was water puddled where the four burner wires connect to the main unit.  He used the vacuum and a hairdryer to dry out the area.  Whew!

And as if that weren't enough cooking excitement for one meal, by the time we got that all cleaned up, Alfons was more than ready to eat and was a bit impatient with his goulash.  He let most of the steam out and then assumed it was okay to take off the lid of the pressure cooker.  WRONG!  As soon as he unlatched the handle, the goulash burst out in 360 degrees!  Red sauce went all over the stove and floor.  I couldn't help but laugh knowing this one wasn't my fault (not directly anyway)!

I hate cooking.  Remember?