How's the Weather?

In general, Germans are not good at small talk. Most think it's superficial and say if you don't have something valuable to contribute to the conversation, you shouldn't say anything at all (especially to a stranger). They think it's funny that Americans who call their office always ask, "So, how's the weather in Germany?"

In fact, many Germans view Americans as superficial, not really wanting to build a true relationship, but instead just get the sale (in business anyway). So I have to teach my students (CEOs and the like) how to small talk comfortably, without laughing. I'm not kidding.

A student told me an interesting story yesterday that was a great teaching tool for me. He was in Chicago for a big conference and was waiting for a taxi, as most other conference attendees were also doing. A bunch of folks were hollering out their destination so they could share rides. He heard someone say "anyone going downtown?" so he jumped into a stretch limo with this guy and a few of his colleagues. They immediately started asking where he worked, where he lived and how the weather was there. At first, he was a little taken aback my their intrusion, but he answered and followed along with their stories about being stationed in Germany decades ago and having a grandmother who came to America from Germany. He said the folks just kept talking, asked lots of questions, made jokes and laughed a lot. He finished his story by smiling and saying, "I had never seen the guy before and have never seen him since, but we exchanged business cards hoping to work together someday."

After he told me the story, I asked if he still thought small talk was such a bad thing. He had changed his mind and said he really enjoyed that limo trip downtown, even if no business came from it. He finally understood that small talk has its place.